Santa Clara University

 The best college student comment on "Boys Will Be Boys" wins a $100 Amazon gift certificate. Entries must be received by midnight, November 25th. Finalists are selected by likes, so get your friends to like your comment. Subscribe to the blog (by RSS or by email in the right hand column) for updates.

The best student comment on "Sleeping Around" wins a $100 Amazon gift certificate.  Entries must be received by midnight, Sunday, Jan. 22.  Finalists are selected by "likes," so click the Facebook icon above to let your friends know about The Big Q contest

It was halfway through Mike's senior year. His grades were up. His friends were close. He was particularly involved in both the skiing and triathlon clubs. However, he recently got into a discussion with his friend Jason that continued to bother him.

Because Mike was both outgoing and good looking, there were a lot of girls interested him. Although he didn’t want any kind of relationship with them—and he told this fact to every one he started to become intimate with—he enjoyed fooling around with a lot of them. Sex was fun for Mike, and as long as he was safe about it, there shouldn’t be anything wrong with the number of partners he had.

His friend, however, disagreed. After calling Mike a man-whore, Jason said, "Isn't sex supposed to be more than just sleeping with any girl who shows an interest in you? And what about the girl's feelings? Shouldn't they be considered?"

Where do you stand on this issue and why? Would you feel any different if Mike were Michelle?

Here are some resources:

A Framework for Ethical Decision Making

Casual Sex in College

No Hooking Up, No Sex for Some Coeds

Good luck and don't forget to like our Facebook Page.  

Best student comment on "Sexting" wins a $100 Amazon gift certificate.  Comments must be posted by midnight Nov. 20.

Mary and her boyfriend of two years, both freshmen in college, have decided to continue dating even though they go to different universities. Unfortunately, after a couple of months apart, they have found it difficult to maintain the intimacy and passion they once shared.

In an attempt to improve the situation, her boyfriend has suggested they send naked pictures to one another. At first, Mary is a little offended that her boyfriend would make such a request; however, the more she considers it, the more she thinks it might be a good idea.

She’s over 18. She’s been dating the boy for a while. Why shouldn’t she?

Here are some resources:

A Framework for Ethical Decision Making

Room for Debate: What's Wrong With Adult Sexting? (New York Times)

Photo by Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com available under a Creative Commons Attribution-Non-Commercial License.

Best student comment on "Long Distance Love" wins a $50 gift certificate.  Comments must be received by midnight Oct. 23.

When Thomas went to college, he left his girlfriend, Angela, back home, 500 miles away. Thomas promised Angela he would remain faithful to her even as he was exploring college life. However, Thomas isn’t sure if being faithful means he’s just not supposed to have sex with other girls.

He has had his eye on a few freshman girls in this dorm. Would it be okay for Thomas to fool around with them as long as he wasn’t having sex? If his girlfriend never specified what faithful meant, is it really all that wrong to do it?

Here are some useful resources: 

A Framework for Ethical Decision Making

Advice for Long Distance Relationships

Surviving a Long Distance Relationship

Photo by abbynormy available under a Creative Commons Attribution-Non-Commercial License.

Best student response this week wins a $50 Amazon gift card.

It all started when Frannie, a 19-year-old sophomore, went to work as a student assistant in the English Department. She had gotten a recommendation for the job from Bill Marsden, who had been her professor in the survey of British literature she took last quarter. The class had been so lively and engaging that Frannie was thinking of declaring English as a major.

After she started working for the department, Professor Marsden always stopped at the reception desk and spent some time chatting with her. As they got to know each other better, it seemed natural that Marsden asked her questions like whether she had big plans for the weekend or whether she had a boyfriend waiting for her back in her hometown. But then she began to notice other signals that maybe he was interested in more than the usual professor-student relationship. He would put his hand over hers for a moment while they talked, and he brought her a collection of the love letters from Elizabeth Barrett to Robert Browning.

Frannie was actually quite flattered by his attention. True, he was probably well into his thirties, but he was still cute, and he was a lot more mature and interesting than the boys she met on campus, whose idea of a good time was beer pong. Frannie was pretty sure Marsden would ask her out if she gave the right signals back. Should she get involved with someone on the faculty?

Here are some resources that may help:

Dating Your Professor: Problems to Consider Before You Date Your Instructor

Yes, Professor?

A Framework for Ethical Decision Making

Seniors Sarah and Ben, who have been good friends since freshman year, became “friends with benefits” after a party a month ago. They just kind of fell into bed with each other. Over time, though, Sarah has started to have romantic feelings for Ben. She continues for a while in their current arrangement, in the hope that Ben will at some point begin to reciprocate her feelings. Eventually, however, as she comes to realize that a long-term relationship doesn’t seem to be in the cards, she tells Ben that she no longer wants sex to be part of their relationship.

That weekend, they decide to go to a party together. The beer is flowing freely, and both of them get drunk. As the evening wears on, they end up going home together and hooking up. When she wakes up in Ben’s apartment the next morning, Sarah realizes that she and Ben have had sex even though she had told him she didn’t want to do that anymore. She’s furious with Ben, but he reminds her that they both were pretty wasted.

Who is at fault? Why?

Best student response to this case wins $50.  Comments must be posted by April 10 at midnight.  Rules

Here are some resources that may help: 

Alcohol and Consent (Dalhousie University)

Hooking Up (Religion and Ethics Weekly)

Sex and the Soul (video of Donna Freitas)

 Risk Factors and Consequences of Unwanted Sex Among University Students